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When any Expat visits Britain they usually return to Spain and moan about the weather and the prices. But what cultural changes are taking place in the homelands?

With advance online booking you can still get a bargain flight for your trip back to Blighty. I flew with Easyjet, which was cheap and on time, but they land in the North terminal, which means a major time consuming expedition to get to the south terminal and into the railway station. But at least the southern region now has shiny new trains, if a little cramped. I won’t mention the fare price, as I don’t want to turn this into a rant.

The sun was shining when I arrived in my hometown of seaside Worthing and I was looking forward to seeing my friends and visiting some old haunts. Walking through the central shopping area I was immediately struck by how quiet it was. Nobody, amongst the white pasty looking faces, seemed to be having any fun or actually talking to their family or companions, unlike any noisy Spanish shopping area.

Many shops had changed hands with even more now occupied by charities trying to raise funds for a host of causes. The only real new entrepreneurs were peddling fresh bread, cakes and coffees in a range of cafes. My friends needed a computer cable and I had promised to buy one for them. Having recently purchased one in Spain for 3 euros it came as a culture shock to have difficulty finding a shop to buy one and, when I did, the price at 12.99! It then dawned on me that Chinese bazaars had not arrived in town, maybe because they are all in Spain. Funny, I thought, how some shops had survived since the long ago days of my childhood. What secrets to successful commerce did they know when many others, including large chains, had long since disappeared. Maybe they don’t base their business on credit?

I visited the library where an interesting display of local building projects was displayed for public information. The same old local wrangles were ongoing with the preservation society lined up against the modernists. It came as no surprise that the towns indoor swimming pool had finally closed down after being opened in a blaze of glory in the 1970s only having survived around a third of the time of its predecessor – so much for modern building techniques. Now a town with a population of 100,000 is left without a pool when most small villages in Spain boast one. Traditional British pub culture is in a very sad decline with many having been demolished or simply closed down. Probablydue to the price of a pint and now the total smoking ban. I have always been a non-smoker but have tolerated the aromas as part of the accepted pub scene. Now the nicotine cravers huddle outside the pubs front door getting their fix like the stressed office and shop workers. The expensive smoke extraction systems, which many pubs had installed, now hang due to redundant from the ceilings.

The beleaguered motorists, surely paying the highest price per mile in the world for the privilege of being mobile, still rule the roads. Being a pedestrian is a life threatening experience unlike being able to step confidently onto a zebra crossing in Spain knowing the cars will give you precedence.

Remember the days of just throwing any old rubbish into your dustbin? Confidently knowing the friendly rubbish men would collect it on a weekly basis. Well those days are gone. You now need a degree is environment waste management to correctly process your refuge into the required receptacle or you risk a heavy fine. How old people cope is beyond me. Only the UK could make such a simple exercise so complicated and stressful for their over council tax burdened citizens.

I now know what the most used word in the English language is. In fact it is `Sorry´. Now don’t get me wrong I appreciate politeness but even the smallest of social errors was accompanied by everyone saying `Sorry´. I really found this culture very noticeable along with everything now timed to the exact minute. Shopping in Argos I was informed my purchase would be available for collection in `4 minutes´ and, later, my pub lunch would be ready in `7 minutes´ – incredible!

During my free Ryanair flight home I mused over all the cultural changes that had hit me. I decided that I had become a foreigner in my homeland and, although I had enjoyed my break, I felt that I had been on an expensive holiday to a foreign country – just like I used to do in a former life.

 

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First printed in The Inland Magazine January 2009